A guide to what’s expected and what you will need to do!!
If you haven’t seen the movie, just do it. It’s a funny raunchy story of what can go horribly wrong and the stress that can be involved in this ever so important job.
So it’s January and we are discovering just how many have gotten engaged over the Christmas holiday period and many of you girls will be asked soon enough to fill the position of bridesmaids and maid of honour or chief bridesmaid.
But many who are asked to be bridesmaids have no idea of just what exactly is expected for them. So here’s the ultimate guide to performing your duties to the letter and keeping everyone happy on the day and the lead up to it.
1. You have one person to answer to.
And it’s probably going to be a best friend or someone very close. If you know the person go with your instincts. You should know what they will want and like. You should be in touch with the brides mother during the process, she will want to be kept informed and feel like a part of the process but it is the brides day.
2. The Dresses
Yes the part that most bridesmaids dread, “what will I be forced to wear, will the colour suit me, what shape” etc.. However remember that the bride to be will want you to look your best standing beside her and will know your tastes and style. The best thing is to approach the subject over a girls night with some nibbles, wine and some bridal magazines. (And of course sites like theweddingguy.ie) in most cases you will have to suck it up and go with what the bride has in mind, remember it’s her day and not all about you or not about you at all!!!
Oh and the fittings, there will be fittings, possibly quite a few. You will be expected to make yourself readily available for these.
3. The Hen Party(s)
There may be a few of these as dates and styles will not suit all members of the families. A good idea is to have a two part day and to have an afternoon affair as in an afternoon tea party with the gifts followed by an evening affair for the more energetic in the group. Thus no one is left out and people can happily attend just one part of the day if the so want.
The chief bridesmaids are responsible for planning this typically all-female fete, so don’t wait until the last minute to get started on the….
Make a Bridal Party Plan
If it’s not a surprise (which is totally up to you), ask the bride what kind of a bridal shower she wants. If she’s not an afternoon tea kind of girl, don’t put on a scones-and-crumpets gathering just because it sounds fun to you, but we love the Shelbourne and The Westbury for these.
Determine Your Budget and Be clear about what everyone owes from the beginning.
Decide On a Date
This can take place anytime between six months to a week before the wedding. Depending on where most of the guests live, you may need to schedule it far in advance so everyone can make travel plans.
Talk To the Bride’s & Groom’s Mothers
Even though she’s not the host of the event, she’ll probably want to pitch in or have siblings or family friends who’d like contribute, whether it’s providing the bridal shower cake or hosting at their house
Gather the Guest List
Ask the bride or the mother of the bride for names and mailing addresses. Everyone invited to the shower should also be invited to the wedding.
Order and Invitations
These should go out between six and eight weeks before the event, depending on how many out-of-towners are on the list. Make sure guests RSVP to one person (the maid of honor, for example) to keep numbers organized.
Share the Couple’s Wedding gift Registry Info
Spread the word about where the bride is registered so that guests don’t get frustrated searching. It’s perfectly acceptable to include this information on the bridal shower invite.
Buy the Bride a Gift
Even though you’re paying for the party, it’s necessary to buy the bride a gift. Consider going in on a group gift from all.
Have a Gift-Opening Plan
On the day of, create a gift-opening assembly line. Here’s how it works: One person should bring the bride a gift to open (and take the already opened gift to a designated spot) and most important, one bridesmaid needs to keep track of who gave what gift so the bride does not have to rely on her memory when writing thank-yous.
4. Preparing for the big day
You should organise one of these emergency kits not only for the bride but also for all the other bridesmaids and figure out a way where it is going to be close to hand on the day
PART 2 coming soon, keep tuned…….